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Fisher King

by Absolute Victory

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1.
Virtuous 07:47
Patience is a virtue Until you let it hurt you You wait around To break new ground But never picked up the hammer Love is just distortion You're split into portions Half selves Stacked on shelves Love is elimination Manners are on an axis Both saviors and fascists Stomp around Break new ground And snatch the other's hammer Sympathy is gone Lost to American songs Flying flags Wearing rags Sucking authority's cock I'm virtuous Can't you see? I'm virtuous Look at me! Please! I'm virtuous Can't you see? I'm virtuous Look at me! Please! I'm a simple man I'm easy to understand I'm a whore A toy of war A blood-curse and a god-send I will grow in pain Sing songs of disdain Cry and whine Sling my slime Biting authority's cock I see lonely gods Grasping on their straws Mining for Shit and ore Something to take control of Patience is distortion Go steal every portion Simple men Sing in tens Swing your fucking hammer I'm virtuous Can't you see? I'm virtuous Look at me! Please! I'm virtuous Can't you see? I'm virtuous Look at me! Please!
2.
Fisher King 03:17
Say the words Say the words Say the words to heal my body Say the words Say the words Say the words to heal my body I can hardly stand I'm not a king, nor a man Say the words to heal my body Thy kingdom come I'm way too young Say the words to heal my body Percival, my brave sir knight Come before me and shine the light And say the words to heal my body I beg you now This kingdom is crumbling down Say the words to heal my body Say the words Say the words Say the words to heal my body Say the words Say the words Say the words to heal my body
3.
I'm afraid of the big black dog I don't know what the hell he wants Sitting there with his big black paws Where the hell did this dog come from? He follows everywhere I go Never gives me any time alone Never barks, never bites my throat But I'm still followed by the big black dog Woah, oh oh A killer hound That just lurks and growls Woah, oh oh Big black dog Drive around in my small red car Stealing drinks in karaoke bars Even days where I got so far I'm still followed by the big black dog Woah, oh oh A killer hound That just lurks and growls Woah, oh oh Big black dog Woah, oh oh A killer hound That just lurks and growls Woah, oh oh Big black dog Woah, oh oh Every town, I get lost, then found Woah, oh oh Big black dog Big black dog Big black dog Big black dog
4.
Everyone around me seems to be Growing into themselves effortlessly I contemplate to be or not to be And what I love is surely hurting me Oh, geez Gravel in my shoes piercing my feet Feels like another you taking stabs at me But out of everything that I believe I never believed you believed in me I needed you I needed to believe That someone else was like me That I could feel good for free And that you believed in me Starting up my car without the keys It's not fancy, it just understands me Crank the radio, I sing in high keys Ian beside me singing harmony Oh, geez 22 year old me needs my teenage dream It's all I can feel, all that I can see I'd give up my life, I would fucking bleed Everything he wants is all a boy could need I needed you I needed to believe That someone else was like me That I could feel good for free And that you believed in me Lie in bed in terror of what haunts me Creeps from underneath up onto my sheets It crawls inside my head, takes control of me It's everything I fear, everything I need I roll around in dirt looking for my mind Rusty scraps of thoughts are all I can find Wishing I was dead, wishing I was blind Over needing you even one more time I needed you I needed you
5.
Why does everything happen so fast? I look around me, and I'm always last I try to plant my feet But I can never seem to grasp But I'm not a monkey I don't have thumbs on my feet Why does every dead man have such a blast? He sees the end, and it makes him act Every time I see you again Our distance grows more vast Just until the night time Suddenly you're texting me Every time we fuck, you say you're so sorry Please shut the fuck up, I know that you're sorry If you really feel so bad Please just stop fucking me I hate that I love you I wish you were nothing to me
6.
Last night I dreamed that I was a prisoner In some made up jail The walls were green, my clothes were clean Each day I sorted mail Nobody came to visit me there These guys were tough as nails So I could escape, I built a boat and a sail But there's no water inside this jail Fuga sentimenti I spend my days lamenting Fuga sentimenti I can't wait to sleep tonight Last night I dreamed I built a flying machine It's wingspan was nine feet wide It carried me to Northern Italy Where I spent the rest of my life I painted trees with Davinci and we Smoked weed every Friday night But he never cleaned, and he left on the TV Every day, we would bicker and fight He said he doesn't have time To do the dishes, he has to work I said, "you never have time To do the dishes You always work" Fuga sentimenti I spend my days lamenting Fuga sentimenti I can't wait to sleep tonight I woke up to a world where I am Running on an empty tank Instead of a jail, I am in my room With empty bottles from the rum I drank Instead of apprenticing with Leonardo I am staring at the canvas blank I wonder what tonight I'll dream and what fantasies I've yet to think Fuga sentimenti I spend my days lamenting Fuga sentimenti I can't wait to sleep tonight
7.
Songs from within Push and pull against my skin I don't control the flow, I just follow where it's been You want the master to give in Acolytes at sea Praying for the man I want to be You cannot tame the song, you just do your best to sing You want the master to be clean Howling like a dog Rolling 'round in the mud Quenched for a drop in the well Feeding everyone but myself Howling like a dog Analyze machines I do not dictate what it means An effort for the life that all else fails to bring You want the master to get wringed Hungry like a wolf Starving for the mind of a fool I am not an artist, I'm a vessel and a tool You want the master to be cool Howling like a dog Rolling 'round in the mud Quenched for a drop in the well Feeding everyone but myself Howling like a dog Long ago I heard The tale of a dog who wandered Streets of gold within the city To find his long lost soul Howling like a dog Rolling 'round in the mud Quenched for a drop in the well Feeding everyone but myself Howling like a dog Aftermath Taking home hard cash Searching for songs like the ones of your past Don't want the master to fall flat One more word All I need is to be heard I don't care about consistency in my work You want the master to be sure Howling like a dog Rolling 'round in the mud Quenched for a drop in the well Feeding everyone but myself Howling like a dog
8.
I don't get mad like I used to Things happen to me, I Sit idly by Where's the angst I thrived on? I used to scream and shout But now my heart pounds, and nothing comes out I can't handle defeat I'm on the edge of my seat Just to see where this dead-end leads I feel objectified I've turned myself into A carnival, and I'm the only one who rides My prime lies behind There's only seven notes And every single one's been wrote I'm no Leonardo And you've never been the type to sit and smirk for hours at a time I don't wanna go home This boat is all I know After all these years, it still brings me to tears I can't face the truth I refuse to say the words To heal my body Say the words Say the words Say the words to heal my body Say the words Say the words Say the words to heal my body Say the words Say the words Say the words to heal my body Say the words Say the words Say the words to heal my body Say the words Say the words Say the words to heal my body Say the words Say the words Say the words to heal my body I can hardly stand I'm not a king, nor a man And now I barely trust my own hands Thy kingdom come I'm way too young The world is hopeless upon my tongue Percival, my brave sir knight Come before me and shine the light The holy grail is my final fight I beg you now This kingdom's crumbling down The war is over, the words are loud Say the words Say the words Say the words to heal my body Say the words Say the words Say the words to heal my body Say the words Say the words Say the words to heal my body Say the words Say the words Say the words to heal my body Say the words Say the words Say the words to heal my body Say the words Say the words Say the words to heal my body Say the words Say the words Say the words to heal my body Say the words Say the words Say the words to heal my body This is the end for our beloved king. Percival approaches the castle dour and shouts upon the guards that he is here to heal the Fisher King Wound. He trudges through the bog and approaches the lake, lifting his muddy boots up into the canoe, the sweat of his palms seeping into his wooden paddle. Out there, in the center of The God's Pool, he finds the Fisher King. He boards the Fisher King's rotting vessel and looks upon his glass eyes. Finally, Excalibur in one hand, grail in the other, our king holding onto his very last breath, Percival speaks unto him the following words:
9.
Every picture I paint has the same shape Let it dry then I cry Every movie I watch has the same name Sequel marathon Ian fills in the plot when I get lost It's more often than not I sing along to "I In Team" I sing the words he forgot Where will I go? The turn is mine, the dice need rolled Spotlights on me I stop and breath How will I know? If I'm depressed or if I'm stoned? Spotlights on me I stop and breath Zyla's keeping me sane, I think I'm insane She tells me I'm doing well My mother's worried about my salvation She thinks I'm burning in hell (oh well) Every time I escape a hot-head's matchbox I still get caught in the flame Throw me into a pool and watch me fizz out We are one in the same Where will I go? The turn is mine, the dice need rolled Spotlights on me I stop and breath How will I know? If I'm depressed or if I'm stoned? Spotlights on me I stop and breath I think I miss you a lot I really miss you a lot
10.
Over my head, it goes Like "oooooohh" Over my head, it goes Like "oooooohh" I fuck around with things I can't control But I want control I like to know things I don't think that I Should wanna know I gaze upon the Ocean of my soul And see a man that I don't know I think it's Time to go; no, wait I think you should stick around! Over my head, it goes Like "oooooohh" Over my head, it goes Like "oooooohh" Colorful days and nights, I walk, I see-- Uh, I see the boats Empty plates that Once held beans and toast But I, uh-- I need a dog to roast! Nothing's great But everything's okay At least, that's what you say And, as for me? I think I'll Stick around, at least-- At least another season or two! Over my head, it goes Like "oooooohh" Over my head, it goes Like "oooooohh" Over my head, it goes Like "oooooohh" Over my head, it goes Like "oooooohh"

about

Thanks: Brandon, Kylie, Callan, Mom & Dad, Beth, Destiny, Marisa, Davis, Will B, Ian, Connor, Zack, Dean, Rosa, Jake, and Cam.
Special thanks to Dean for letting me use his one of his old doodles in the album cover.
Three different songs on this album pay homage to three musical artists that have inspired me in different ways over the years: Will Toledo, Leonard Cohen, and Ian Dorsey. Thank you all.

credits

released October 14, 2022

Written, performed, recorded, mixed and mastered by Jonathan Harper.
Track 9 Interpolates "The 'I' In Team" by Expiring. Listen to that song here:
soundcloud.com/undeadaquaticanimal/the-i-in-team
Recorded at Jackie's Kitchen between 4/10/2022 and 5/11/2022.

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Absolute Victory Maryland

hi, i'm jonathan and i make music.
thanks for listening,
if you do

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